one bee - March 2004

Time for the RIAA to start defaming Richard Clarke—10:32 AM

Study: File-Sharing No Threat to Music Sales [WP]

"From a statistical point of view [...] there is no effect between downloading and sales"

(WP requires registration, but feel free to use mine: wp@ph7media.com, password ph7media) It turns out that, as I've been screaming all along, those who download music aren't necessarily those who would ever have bought the same song for money in the first place, so all of RIAA's plaintive wailing about how music sharing is killing the recording industry is hogwash. I've never downloaded music illegally, but my friend who has says that he usually downloads songs he wouldn't want if they weren't free, or uses music sharing to preview songs that he later buys on CD. Take THAT, music industry!

This quote is particularly priceless, from the head of a media research firm that claimed in an earlier study that music sharing was destroying record sales. (All they did was compare sales over the period when file sharing was becoming popular, which is an absurd post hoc ergo procter hoc argument and ignores the fact that the major labels have just been making poorer music over the same period. It should come as no surprise that their study was commissioned by "a music industry trade publication.") Anyway, he defends the position that the Internet has negatively affected record sales by saying, "It's had an effect on everything else in life, why wouldn't it have an effect on this?" This is the sort of rhetorical misdirection that tells you somebody's argument lacks factual support. First, the Harvard/UNC study doesn't say that the Internet has had no effect on record sales; they say that its net negative effect has been statistically negligible. Plus, to say that the Internet has had an effect on everything in life is absurd (the Internet has had no effect on toothpaste) and, even if it had, that's no reason to assume it will affect the next thing. Plus, even if you're going to follow that weak thread, you still can't assume that since the Internet has had an effect on something else, it must have had a negative effect on record sales. The lesson is: If you need something researched, don't hire Edison Media Research!

But read the article. It's good.

On the way in to work—9:47 AM

On the way in to work today, I saw two posters for Julianne Moore's upcoming romantic something-or-other, Laws of Attraction. You can write your own punch line.

Mon, March 29

On Maggie

It should come as no surprise that I've concocted yet another fantasy life for myself and some poor girl I've never met. The key is, I'm gonna try damn hard and learn from this! (Read more.)

7 comments with related links

Good news, everyone! I—8:25 PM

Good news, everyone! I finally decided to get smart about this site's search functionality. In the bad old days, it was a literal match kind of thing, which was great if you were searching for something very specific, but poor otherwise. Lately, I switched to fuzzier relevance-based matching, which searches for all the words in your query and ranks results according to how well they fit. This was great for finding things without having to know an exact phrase. (Searching for Bush evil, for example, would get you the right stuff even if the phrase "Bush evil" didn't appear in the text exactly.) But the problem there is, the more words in your query, the more results will match at least one of them – searching for something specific had a tendency to muddy the waters. (The least likely matches were way at the bottom, but still.) Now, I've added Google-style "exact phrase" matching, to achieve the best of both worlds. Wrap quotes around a phrase to include it in your search – while fundamentally terrible will net you a huge result set, "fundamentally terrible" will point you right at the Survivor: All-Stars articles.

I hope to add Google's minus-sign feature very soon, also.

Sun, March 28

AvgM: Grand Slams, Iambs—10:48 PM

2004 Baseball Preview (In Rhyme!) [Athletic Reporter]

Arksie continues to demonstrate why someone should just give him a damn job writing witty things about sports for a ridiculous salary already, so I can go ahead and commence the process of riding his coattails to fame, fortune, and the accompanying sexually adventuresome female hangers-on.

Especially noteworthy: "If [the Yankees] don't win the Series, I'll consider it a blessing,/ Then laugh as hard as I don't at any shows with Debra Messing."

Ernest Lawrence Thayer, eat your heart out.

Fri, March 26

Spikey Tails = Victory!—9:37 PM

Even with Wonderfalls on, I managed to catch the ends of both the Duke-Illinois game and the Georgia Tech-Nevada game on CBS as part of their coverage of March Craziness. These are the teams that matter to my family, so I was glad to be part of the excitement, even at a distance of a few thousand miles. You have to hand it to these commentators, though. I guess they have a lot of time to fill. Arksie made the point this week that they can be a bit clueless, and I certainly found them to be obsessed with injury. (Does anybody know whether or not Chris Duhon's ribs were bruised? I didn't notice.) Anyway, fun games, both. And although maybe the Blue Devils managed to open up their lead in the second half to the point where the final seconds lacked nail-biting, I still thought both were compelling. Watching some of the passing and assisting, I was reminded of my usual wide-eyed awe in the face of teamwork. (Search for Saving Private Ryan or Cirque du Soleil or Air Force One.) Maybe it's because I'm such a sullen loner that I'm always fascinated by smoothly coordinated teams. And maybe it's because every group project I've ever been on, I ended up doing the work for the whole team myself, the night before it was due. Am I right, people?

Anyway, congratulations to the Blue Devils and the Yellow Jackets – I'll be tuning in to see your highlights on Dream Job Sunday night! And, to CBS, make the winning team a different color! Wake up and get in the game, people! Are you covering sports for the first time? When it's a mini-update in the corner of the screen, they manage to color the name and score of the winning team yellow in order to make it read more quickly, but when it's time for the full-screen final score, they just leave everything white. At least SportsCenter has a yellow arrow! Something! Come on! Meet me halfway here! I'll turn this bus around!

1 comment

Thu, March 25

T-ShirtGate 2: West—10:58 AM

T-ShirtGate 2: West Virginia Is for Sister-Lovers [Wonkette]

This article isn't that important, but I loved it just for this: "Alert the irony police! Have knife ready in case you are confronted with 10,000 spoons!"

By the way, also apropos of nothing, an excellent McTWCSE last night, with the valiant return of Arksie and Texas Hold 'Em. $$ for me, much happiness. The villagers rejoice.

Tue, March 23

Running with Scissors

The key to Survivor is strategy, but everyone's too busy posturing and panicking to ever get around to it. Yet another reason that Survivor: All-Stars is a fundamentally terrible idea. (Read more.)

1 comment with related links

Boom-Boom Wants More Tit—4:43 PM

MPAA Chief Finds Decency Clampdown Worrisome [Reuters]

We all know what Jeff Douma's character would have to say about this, and in a large way I agree that this doesn't make sense as a free-speech issue. Especially not for the MPAA – aren't most of their projects released on DVD or in theatres? Valenti should've argued that it's ridiculous puritanical hogwash. That argument I could get behind.

Mon, March 22

Amazon.com is Plenty Dopey

I've gone a few rounds with Amazon.com before, so it's no surprise that they're not that bright and they don't have very good customer service. But, still. (Read more.)

I was catching up on—10:52 PM

I was catching up on Joan of Arcadia over the weekend, and they had an episode in which one of Joan's dad's cases involved an elderly guy who accidentally mowed down a bunch of people in a farmer's market. It's rare and off-putting when shows that don't do the "ripped from the headlines" thing co-opt a story from reality like that. It got me thinking about Russell Weller again, though. In the show, Babsy and her gaggle of scribes seemed to be aiming for the point that even when you want to be angry at someone, when it's an accident you just have to realize that life is rough. Joe "I don't get mad, I get stabby" Mantegna's character wanted to lash out at the elderly driver because his negligence reminds him of the drunk driver who crippled his son. The show seems to say, "Yes... but that would be wrong," and I guess I can respect that. It's a TV show. But I still say, hang the bastard! Because, while anger and hostility at Weller won't necessarily bring anyone back to life, neither will his tearful apology. He should never have been behind the wheel in the first place. Make an example of him, and while you're at it, rework the entire driver licensing process for anyone over 60 or with a history of mental infirmity. If they have to take a couple of extra vision tests and prove their reaction time, it's a small price to pay to make the rest of us safer.

Hearing Set... [KNBC]

2 comments with related links

"Journalists"—12:55 PM

Fears Impacted US Reporting on Iraq [AP]

This just irritates me to no end, and validates my bitching and whining about the media around this time last year. Of course, Arksie will probably turn this around on the so-called "liberal media"...

1 comment

Fri, March 19

It's interesting how synchronicity works.—5:37 PM

It's interesting how synchronicity works. Wednesday I was at the supermarket and saw the "Globe" headline about how Katie Couric is apparently regarded as some major bitch all of a sudden. Then today, the link to Salon's article on the same subject (don't worry, they – generally – come to her defense) was posted on some blog that I got to by following some other blog that was accused of stealing the design of yet another blog, but in fact was only drawing design inspiration from it – which came up because another website (that of movie funnyboy Harland Williams) was catching heat for stealing the design of that same blogger's website. It can be a curse sitting in front of a high-speed Internet connection for eight hours a day...

Anyway, Katie Couric.

The Cruella syndrome [Fucking Salon]

(You'll have to go through that "Day Pass" crap, unless you're crazy enough to have paid for Salon Premium, but it's pretty worth it, and you can do other stuff while you click through the Day Pass ads.)

Salon makes some interesting points about the way we relate to successful women in this society. It was recently pointed out that the presidential campaign is all about macho. "Intelligent" seems "effeminate" – a man's man doesn't waffle on issues; he acts quickly, decisively, and with finality. (And unilaterally? And with faulty facts or no facts at all?) It seems that, on the other side of the spectrum, smart (or successful or ambitious) women are cast as "bitchy." During their exploration of this trend, Salon makes some points – almost by accident – about the state of the "news" business that I agree with, in part because I've been trying to make them myself for years.

Couric, quoted by Salon from an interview with CNN: "The climate is such that there's so much emphasis on ratings [...] When there is so much emphasis on ratings, it's hard for true journalism to survive."

Bingo! Also recommended reading:

State of the News Media 2004 [Project for Excellence in Journalism]

This is a huge report, but I really urge you to at least read the Content Analysis sections in the Cable TV and Local TV areas. (The intros in those areas are important, too.) If you've agreed with anything I've said about the decline in actual news reportage by cable nets like CNN, etc., you'll really enjoy this. If you haven't agreed, you probably will after reading this.

What was most surprising for me was finding a compatriot in the fight against "fluff news" in Katie Couric. I used to watch the Today show quite a lot, back when I was in school and the government was forcing me to get up ridiculously early in order to start my learnin'. I don't necessarily know why we were a today household – mostly Jane Pauley I guess, although possibly also because we were (and remain) huge Brokaw fans and I never really considered the possibility of getting our morning news from one network and our evening news from another. (Why, I don't know. Probably would've gotten more perspective that way.) Some days, we watched Tom & Jerry or Bullwinkle in the morning instead.

Anyway, I liked Katie Couric when she started on Today – in fact, my bedroom wall at home still sports an autographed picture of her – but after a few years, I started to feel like she was losing her "hard news" edge. I think it was the day she asked the mother of a young girl who had been killed on the school bus by a stray bullet from a drive-by shooting, "How did you feel?" But, more than that, she just wasn't covering news stories as much as she was doing cooking segments and interviewing celebrities.

In reality, I probably should've been blaming the producers of the show instead of Couric, because it was the start of a backslide in journalistic content that continues to this day. An NBC spokesman who defended Couric in the Salon article is quoted as saying that the Today show "still has hard news in its first half hour," which to me sums it up perfectly. It's well known that Today cuts back on the hard news after 7:30, because more women are watching during that period and they figure girls are too dumb to understand news, so they show them cooking and sewing instead. Sad. Even sadder, NBC sees this as a defensible position from which to counter assaults on Couric's journalistic integrity. "We still offer actual news stories in the first quarter of our behemoth show," they seem to be saying, "so that should cover Katie for 90 minutes of make-up tips and celebrity gossip." They probably count Martha Stewart updates as part of their 30 minutes of "hard" news.

Which is another thing. State of the Media does well to point out – as did CNN's Paula Zahn on a recent Daily Show – that the obsession with getting something "live" and "first" is degrading the ability of TV journalists to get and validate sources for their stories. (Read the Cable TV Content Analysis. Really.) We all watched the crazy, silly attempts by the cable nets to be the first to report the verdict in the Martha Stewart case (as if this were particularly newsworthy, anyway) and how frequently that resulted in being wrong. How ridiculous! CNN's market domination used to be based on its perceived integrity among cable news providers; these days they're under pressure to loosen their grip on that image as they compete with networks who grab viewers by being quick and flashy – often at the expense of being right.

(This entry got a bit long. Please put in a comment when you read it, even just to say hi. I'm trying to decide if I should be like my bank and hold everything after 2:30 on a Friday for release on Monday.)

7 comments with related links

Thu, March 18

Wonderfalls

I would never suggest that any show (or any thing in life, really) could ever replace Ed. However, Fox's Wonderfalls makes for delightfully comfortable viewing while mourning the loss of Ed and fondly reminiscing. (Read more.)

Wed, March 17

My Architect

Nathaniel Kahn's documentary investigates the life and life's work of his father, the world-famous architect Louis I. Kahn. It's a fascinating and deeply personal story – of course, most may not slip into Nathaniel's shoes as easily as I did. (Read more.)

Earlier this week (or—5:21 PM

Earlier this week (or last), the 2004 Bloggies were announced. I swear to you, I'm not becoming a blog person or anything, I just happened to find this out. Anyway there are a few blogs that I read now and then and regularly enjoy, and I am in the business of writing personal articles online, so I thought it might be interesting to see what else is out there. I admit that something like the 2004 Bloggies is a terrible way to learn about new blogs, because it's like using the Billboard chart to learn about what the best music is – the undiscovered stuff is probably much better, but I have a day job and not enough time to read every site in the world, so I have to start somewhere.

Anyway, I'll try to keep this brief.

The winner in the "best-kept secret" category (See? I tried to get at the good stuff.) is called "tequila mockingbird" which is a cute name because it combines the title of my favorite Mel Gibson movie with the title of my favorite Robert Duvall movie. I bookmarked it, along with a handful of others, for perusing later when I had a few minutes to spare. And that day is today. At around quarter to five, I realized that I had just enough time to read a new entry from a new blog and so I checked it out. I think the story that Julia posted today on tequila mockingbird is sweet and poignant, and lightly addresses important issues of prejudice and hate in a manner befitting the innocent honesty of the site's homonymous book/film. If you have a few minutes, I encourage you to read it for yourself. If not, consider bookmarking it for later.

the letter v. the spirit [tequila mockingbird]

Try not to be afraid; as with any blog, there are probably plenty of links and other things you don't undertsand – but you can ignore those and just concentrate on the task at hand. Don't let it overwhelm you, I have every confidence in you.

3 comments

Tue, March 16

Dream Job

In a way, me watching ESPN's Dream Job seems to make as much sense as R. Kelly watching The View. But reality TV makes strange bedfellows. (Read more.)

Mon, March 15

It's Pronounced "Throatwarbler Mangrove"

This week on Chapera's Island Vacation: a further reduction in the season's challenge count, and – with the loss of Sue and the last remaining flashback footage of Hatch – an army of nudity pixelators are pink-slipped. (Read more.)

Maim Nader

On the advice of counsel, I've had to dial down the homicidal epithets, but Ralph Nader has entered the 2004 presidential race, and buckle up, because I have a few things to say about it! (Read more.)

Wah!—2:47 PM

Pieces of 'Ed' Set Are Auctioned to Fans [AP]

I had hoped that maybe it wasn't officially canceled yet, since NBC was playing coy. Good news, though, for fans of Newlyweds:

MTV Taps Another Simpson With 'Ashlee' [AP]

I particularly like this part: "The new show will follow Ashlee as she records her first album, on Geffen Records, auditions a band and breaks up with her boyfriend." Boy, I hope he doesn't read the papers! He might break up with her first!

Oh, for Christ's sake! (Literally)—2:35 PM

Hollywood Rethinking Faith Films [NY Times]

Life has lost all meaning... [Permanently Disco]

Fri, March 12

Everyone's Excited and Confused...—11:07 PM

Why is everybody ganging up on me? First Arksie says "Thank you, no" to the idea of a blog ($1000 to anyone who can come up with something else to call it! Please!) and then I get busted for my flirtation with Wonkette. It meant nothing! Believe me – I'm not even a cat person!

To set the record straight, Wonkette may work harder at stoking the fury of my Dubya hatred (with her eleventy zillion daily posts), but Permanently Disco has more heart and more indie cred. (Plus, a TMBG reference and a NewsRadio reference? Heaven.) I've even been honored with a link on the homepage. Would that coy minx Wonkette ever consider such a thing? Methinks not! (And, as soon as I get a links section, Erica, you know you're on it!)

Permanently Disco (that's Permanently Disco, by the way) will always be near and dear to my heart – after all, this new section on pH7media.com was inspired by an enjoyable debate over at PD. (Concerning Ralph Nader's presidential bid – for weeks I've been meaning to put my thoughts together for a Nader column in the News & Views section, but I think all my best material is stored in the Permanently Disco comments section.)

In closing, in case there's any doubt as to which is my favorite blog:

I promise to do better at making everyone feel equally loved, even the anonymous cowards.

Blog Poll: Oh, the Humanity!—5:30 PM

Don't all rush to my defense at once, by the way.

Anyway, just a brief update on the Sloganator issue – thought you might enjoy this recap of the saga.

Bush Site Unplugs Poster Tool [Wired]

Our li'l Wonkette is pretty good with the serious substantive sound bite when the need arises. I also love how indignant the Bush faithful are when their own pathetic technological ignorance rises up and bites them on the ass.

1 comment with related links

Thu, March 11

"He touched his... penis! Against my... penis"

The freakshow that is Survivor: All-Starscontinues to deliver the thrills. To paraphrase young Dirk, with twists like these, who needs twists? (Read more.)

How can you not be—2:18 PM

How can you not be terrified that these people are allowed to vote?

Complaints to FCC Regarding Super Bowl [The Smoking Gun, via Permanently Disco]

It's sadly predictable that the messages with the highest levels of religious histrionics also feature the most spelling/grammar errors. Cheers, though, to TSG for pointing out that the fury didn't start until after the AFA mobilized its base.

Also preposterous: XXX-DVDs a new hazard for drivers [CNN]

Aw.—10:48 AM

Viacom is back [Dish Network]
Dish Network Agreement [Viacom]

Well it was fun while it lasted. I'm hoping this means Echostar coughed up the extra six cents, but of course neither party mentions it. Viacom says they got Echostar to accept Nicktoons, which represents at least a small victory. I'll keep researching, but if anyone uncovers the details of the new arrangement, I'd love to hear.

Update: EchoStar ends Viacom dispute, reveals SEC probe [Reuters]

Looks like Viacom mostly got its way, and EchoStar is under SEC investigation for unrelated shady business (alluded to in Tuesday's Viacom statement). Also, it seems I've been misspelling EchoStar with a little 's'. So? Screw them!

Wed, March 10

I haven't read this—7:23 PM

I haven't read this yet, but MoveOn wanted me to pass it along, so here it is:

The New Pentagon Papers [Salon]

Notice the sanctimonious "Editor's Note" which celebrates the fact that Salon is giving us a freebie. I had thought that some of Salon's articles were still free – maybe that changed – but even if not, it's pretty slimy to make it free only to readers who have heard about a secret MoveOn link. (Note that the Salon link features the non-free version.)

Even with Clinton cutie Sidney Blumenthal heading their spankin'-new D.C. bureau, I still have very little love for Salon.

Comedy Central is doing—7:14 PM

Comedy Central is doing parent company Viacom's bidding with its characteristic wit and aplomb. I just caught up with last night's Daily Show on TiVo, and they're running an ad which says, in part, "if you know anybody who has Dish Network, make room for them on your couch because they're going to be watching a lot of TV at your place." Very cute.

More on the evil Dish Network bastards—5:00 PM

I love it. Dish Network says it plans to charge customers who try to break their contract and sign up with DirecTV. Viacom FAQ [Dish Network] (see the last item)

How ludicrous. "I don't have time for you to 'monitor the duration of the loss of channels'! I'm missing SpongeBob!"

DirecTV could clean up right now if they offered a deal to pay off half of your early termination fee with Dish Network and have an install tech at your door within 24 hours to get you over your TRL withdrawal.

No Crank Yankers? I'll be in the pool.—10:35 AM

Update! Yay! A win for Viacom, and a big win for DirecTV!

Dish Network Pulls Viacom Channels [Le Dot du Slash]

Burn in hell, Echostar!

Update: Viacom Press Briefing [Viacom]
CBS/Viacom Statement [CBS]

I honestly don't understand how Dish Network thinks it will win this one. Regardless of the reality, it's easy for Viacom to paint Echostar as the villain, since Echostar is the one pulling the channels off the air. (By the way, Echostar also apparently superimposed black boxes over the on-screen messages Viacom sent out, in at least some cases. I didn't see it myself – I have DirecTV.)

It seems to me that two things will happen. Dish Network subscribers will bail by the thousands, and Echostar will end up crawling back to Viacom (or going out of business). You simply can't have a satellite/cable company that lacks so many of the most popular channels (including a major network). I know I sided against CBS back in January, but it turns out I like Echostar even less than I like the Bush administration. Go figure.

Anyway, it will be fun to see what unfolds. I'll be staying tuned. (I can; I have DirecTV! Ha!)

The Ass-Fucking Stops Now!—9:58 AM

W: All Things to All People [Wonkette]

This is entertaining on many levels, chiefly "Why in the hell would the Bush campaign offer such a feature on their site?" It seems like it has more potential for bad than for good. I also love the "blacklisted" words, of which Wonkette has diligently unearthed a few. There was a time when Andy and I were going to venture into e-entrepreneurship with a site called effin-a.com, which would serve as a centralized blacklist filter for its membership. Sadly, this never came to be. (If we'd been able to get Bush/Cheney '04 as a client, I could've surreptitiously removed "Hitler" from their list!)

Update! As Wonkette reports, the Bush/Cheney web server is a tad inundated with snarky poster taglines, and sometimes serves up the wrong PDF. I typed in (just to get started) "It burns when I pee." and it gave me another hooligan's witty "Let's elect him this time!" This is more fun than the rock-'em sock-'em Kerry game!

Mini-Update: More excitement from the Sloganator investigation team over at Wonkette – some soulless webmaster on the Bush/Cheney team is getting exactly what he deserves...

The Sloganator: A Guide [Wonkette]

Tue, March 9

Mid-Season Shows

The TV networks are taking a few minutes off from airing FCC-friendly disclaimers and "Family Guides" to the TV rating system to insult our intelligence even further with a roundup of mid-season replacement shows. Only a total stooge would bother to recap and evaluate this tripe! (Read more.)

I had an appointment—12:16 AM

I had an appointment with the optometrist Monday morning, and when she started doing her thing, I had to work hard to stifle a giggle. I'm always reminded of an appearance by Todd Barry on Dr. Katz, Professional Therapist (it might be Marc Maron instead of Barry; Joe will correct me), in which he describes sleeping with an optometrist and all night she's saying, "Better like this, or better like this?"

My optometrist is really cute, by the way. She reminds me of a slightly sexier Sofia Coppola. (Which both of them would probably resent, since my guess is that Dr. Asemi is Persian, while Sofia is Italian. But if you saw them together, you'd agree there's a resemblance.)

2 comments

It's War!—12:01 AM

It appears that Echostar (the Dish Network people) are involved in a little skirmish with CBS/Viacom. They're threatening to drop CBS and the Viacom networks (Comedy Central and anything that begins with "Nick" or "MTV") rather than pay a nominal rate increase to keep the stations. This is even more futile than the L.A. grocery strike – a satellite provider simply can't live without the Viacom nets.

It's great news for me, though, because I've spent the last two years talking satellite-curious friends out of Dish Network and into the vastly superior DirecTV. I always thought of it as a glib and pointless remark when I referred to Echostar as "Small time. Above-ground pool people." Turns out, I was right!

Tonight, I saw 2 messages crawl across the screen urging Dish Network subscribers to call and complain – one during The Daily Show and one during Cheers on TV Land. (Expecting Dish Network subscribers to read above a second-grade level is a heady risk.) Plus a message on CBS.com. I'm impressed because Viacom is using Dish Network's own service to distribute its message against them, which is cool. Echostar was always a tad cocky, in my view. They tried to buy DirecTV a while back, and yes, I am happier with Rupert Murdoch owning my satellite service than having it fall into the clutches of those savages. Go get 'em, Sumner!

Sun, March 7

This morning the—11:39 AM

This morning the helicopters overhead reminded me that the L.A. Marathon is being run today. I noticed a number of mile markers on my commute home Friday, but I hadn't realized that the 19th mile runs along 6th Street about a half-block south of my home. So, when I flipped on the TV, I got to see them run by. Good for them!

However, I'm shocked that there's no rule about the camera vans being electric-powered or anything. The cavalry of KNBC cameras are just grinding around in minivans. And at low speeds! You would think that – with the heat and the noise and all the other runners making it hard enough – they'd have regulations in place to keep the marathonners from having to inhale fumes for the entire 26-odd miles. Sheesh!

Fri, March 5

Aw. Martha Stewart—12:14 PM

Aw. Martha Stewart Guilty

Yay! Eisner Out as Disney Chairman

Ha! Gay Marriage...

Let the Eagle Soar—11:45 AM

Ashcroft Hospitalized

I heard this on the NPR update as I was pulling out of my driveway this morning, and I have to say it made me smile. Obviously I'm not cruel enough to wish ill upon any creature of this Earth – but a walking incarnation of Satan? Yeah, I'm okay if he gets a tummyache.

Thu, March 4

You Know What You Can Do With Your Vicuna

Lo and behold, they've sent the fancy boy packing (not that there's anything wrong with that). Victory, she is sweet. Twists, however? Meh. Let's whip Sue into another frenzied tirade, those always pay off. (Read more.)

Arksie, read this—9:56 AM

Klosterman on Pirates

I was going to just email this to Arksie, since he and K-licious were generous enough to bestow Klosterman's newest book upon me, but then I realized you might all appreciate it. (Especially you Rupert fans!)

Gr: Bush 9/11 Ads AP:—9:35 AM

Gr: Bush 9/11 Ads

AP: "[Karen] Hughes said the ads are a tasteful reminder of what the country has been through the last three years." Reminder? Who among us is all that likely to forget? Isn't she supposed to be at home with her family?

By the way, on the drive in today, I was chattering to myself as usual and I started thinking (as I often do) what a terrific candidate I would make for a Truman Show-style secret reality show. You would never have to worry what the character was thinking. Although you'd definitely want to keep one finger on the Bleep button. Of course, I immediately realized that if this is the life that TV producers have scripted for me, they would have to be some cruel, sadistic sons of bitches.

Wed, March 3

Amber Tamblyn was right—9:45 PM

Not that I'm ever in the position, but lately I've been thinking that if I were ever called upon to make an argument that a supreme being exists, Exhibit A would definitely be bacon.

Okay, so this merits—2:26 AM

Okay, so this merits some explaining and also some graphical fine-tuning, but it's becoming very late, so both will have to wait for tomorrow. I should say however that I fully intended to spend tonight working on the Survivor column and then this happened instead. Oops.

What follows is specifically not a blog, although the only reason it's not is that I say it's not. The name – and pre-2004 content – was cannibalized from a short-lived, now-defunct, and never-published foray into blogging over at Blog*Spot, which is why there are strange things like links back to this site. For various reasons, I decided to incorporate the functionality here instead, and it seemed worthwhile to house all the old data in one place (plus, the writing finally sees the light of day).

As I said, there are a number of refinements forthcoming, but none major enough to prevent me from calling this "Good" for tonight. Enjoy!

Ikeaphobia and its discontents

Tue, March 2

Something to Aim for—10:45 PM

This is interesting. I came upon this today, and it made me think about the potential that rants have. If – in the spectrum of short-form, semi-persuasive, personal writing – 5 is a well reasoned essay by Richard Dawkins, and 1 is an obscenity-laden, unorganized tirade by Maddox, then my writing on this site generally falls around a 2, 2.5. Something like this, however:

Rates somewhere just above a 4. It's personal. Passionate (even angry). Entertaining. But also well reasoned and nicely organized. I don't know, I guess it's just an area I'd like to explore more.