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Faster than a sleeping infant!—3:50 PM

On the way to a late lunch, I watched an LA city bus go by with a banner on its side advertising Discovery Channel's upcoming special Pompeii: The Last Day. The copy on the ad was something along the lines of: "How would you outrun a lava flow faster than this bus?"

I see the point. They're trying the same approach that was (in my opinion) a very effective attention-grabber for Godzilla a few years ago. (Banners like, "His foot is the size of this bus," and billboards like, "He's taller than this sign.") However, they're forgetting a key element: buses are intrinsically big. You can always make an impressive comparison to a bus's size. But buses – particularly on LA streets – are not that fast.

When I saw the ad, all I could imagine was this giant, bubbling lava flow trudging down the right-hand lane, belching smog, while dozens of SUVs and convertible BMWs swerved into the left lane (without using their turn signals) in order to get around it.

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