Wed, March 30, 2005
"Gwyneth didn't have to declare her Apple!"—8:53 PM
Arksie brings up the following story from Yahoo! News: Hilary Swank Fined for Fruit Import, making the point that he traveled down under recently and they tell you ahead of time that you have to declare fruit. Hilary's assertion is that when she arrived in New Zealand she forgot she had an orange and an apple with her. I for one buy it, because five years ago she forgot she had a husband at the Academy Awards – she seems a little flaky in that regard.
Anyway, to me, the more important point is: the fine that she tried to appeal was only $142. With an additional $21 (referred to by the AP only as "costs" – but we can assume these are fees associated with filing the appeal), that comes to a whopping $163. Best Actress of the Year? I think she can afford it. What the hell is she doing writing handwritten letters on behalf of $163? If she needs $163 so bad, she should do like David spade and do some CapitalOne ads. (Or worse, accept a role on 8 Simple Rules.)
Here's my suggestion: seeing-stars.com lists the following as her mailing address.
Hilary Swank
c/o SFM
1122 S. Robertson Blvd., Suite 15
Los Angeles, CA 90036
By my calculations, this site has about six readers, give or take. I think we should each write her a check for $27.16 and mail it to her with a note saying we're sorry those swarthy foreigners gave her a hard time, shouldn't they know she's royalty to us, they should burn in hell, Lord of the Rings sucked anyway. (Damn, now we're down to only five participants. $32.60, everyone!)
"Holly" — Thu, 3/31/05 11:45pm
Damn straight.