Tue, March 21
The Adorable Race—11:09 PM
Sorry, non-McRacers, this may not make much sense. But for the rest of you, I contend that it cannot get any cuter than:
Tipping Phil
A super-sized, neon PHIL
A gaggle of contestants all spontaneously employing the term "systematic" over the course of a few hours
A Groundhog Day reference to driving in circles
"They're running backwards – you see, Peter?"
"Santa?"
A Puerto Rican Natalie Portman. Dancing. Near the point of tears. In lederhosen.
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Fri, March 17
Certifiable March Insanity—12:59 PM
The fam and I took in four games from the first round of the 2006 NCAA Men's Basketball Tournament yesterday. (I know! Me! Two months ago, I couldn't tell you the difference between a free throw and a fielder's choice. In fact, I still can't, but it seems like my live sports attendance is up 6000% this year.)
We were lucky enough to see two upsets, along with one Florida victory (which prevented some potentially nasty riots), plus the dazzling and bedazzled Texas A&M dance squad – all of whom are now invited to give me a call sometime.
And don't let it be said that you missed out on the fun: enjoy the pictures in this lovingly crafted photo gallery.
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Thu, March 16
"Houston, we have a problem."
NASA-level smarts won't help you on Survivor. The only background that prepares you for this is bartender, or pharmaceutical rep. (Read more.)
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Wed, March 15
Those fuckers!—9:35 AM
I woke up today to find that our local paper, "The Florida Times-Union" has stolen my idea! They're hosting an online March Madness-style tournament of movies. (Granted, I originally stole this idea from The Morning News, but... still.)
Anyway, they took the easy way out and drew their 64 picks from all the movies ever made, rather than just last year's disappointing crop. And – what do you know? – their tournament made splashy headlines across the front page of the Lifestyle section. The bastards.
I say we all go to their tournament and vote for all the wrong movies. That'll show 'em!
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Mon, March 13
Dead to Me: Miss Alli—12:10 PM
The Amazing Race continues, having been restored to its former, unruined state. Lacking my McRace peeps to enjoy it with, I'm reading the TWoP recaps. Today, Miss Alli has earned my undying respect and become dead to me, all in one sentence:
BJ and Tyler [...] clearly have a serious case of Robin Williams Disease, in which it is impossible not to be "on" for even one moment while a camera is running,
Undying respect!
... and while that's charming for an hour-long standup special or a movie in which you play a professional nurturer
She's dead to me!
... it is something I find impossibly tiresome in a race team.
(On this I happen to disagree also. I'm loving BJ and Tyler, affected as they are. But it's included here just for the sake of completing her sentence.)
Update: A few pages later:
I'm not sure that Failure To Launch is really what I'm looking for in a date movie. I could list the reasons, but that would add a page and a half to the recap. Suffice it to say that they start with my inability to identify with Sarah Jessica Parker, ever, to the point where usually, I want whatever character she's playing to wind up unhappy.
Much vigorous head-nodding. Okay, she's no longer dead to me. But seriously, Patch Adams? Charming? Scenes of adorable Monica Potter eye candy interrupted by atrocious yukking, yes. Charming, no.
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Bobcat Wars—11:11 AM
Pool construction continued this weekend with the rental of a pair of mini Bobcats, with which we collected all the dirt that had been dug out of the pool from its giant, towering piles and brought it back around the edges of the pool to properly grade the lawn.
This became an exhausting process, making a quick dip in the pool at lunch a refreshing and welcome break. (Also refreshing: semifinal and championship victories for Duke during our lunchtime ACC Tournament.) Despite the soreness and exhaustion, it was all worth it when we could relax and take in the final product.
Abby and Laney relax by the pool.
Of course, nothing's ever final. We'll be laying sod around three sides of the pool on Tuesday, and mortaring in the brick patio in the coming weeks. But at least the final product is beginning to take shape. Mission Accomplished!
Thu, March 9
Sons & Daughters—9:19 AM
Did anyone else see it? We had to TiVo Scrubs and The Unit (damn David Mamet being involved in things!), so we only watched the second of the two premiere episodes: "Bowling Night."
Seemed pretty dismal to me. It seems to have adopted the quick pace and hand-held camerawork of Arrested Development without any of the laughs. The quick pace only really works if it's funny; otherwise it's just confusing. You can't substitute "overtalk" for humor.
It was hard to be sure which scenes were the improvised ones, but my guess was the scene in the van between Cameron and his dad and the scene in bed between Don and Sharon, brainstorming bedroom role-playing games. In both cases, it was easy to spot Lorne Michaels's influence: the actors were giggling at each other as they ran through the scene. It's the only thing Horatio Sanz and Jimmy Fallon did onscreen in Fallon's last season at SNL.
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Wed, March 8
Jokers Wild
The wheels are coming off at Casaya – and, baby, they're coming off with a vengeance. (Read more.)
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Mon, March 6
Oscar Night—12:00 AM
Well, it's over and the results couldn't be more disappointing. Crash for Best Picture? Rachel Weisz for Best Supporting Actress? What's the world coming to?
But of course the important results weren't disappointing at all. I finally pulled off my first-ever victory in the onebee Oscar Pool, eking out a victory even after "squandering" ten points on the utterly deserving Amy Adams in a sympathy vote. Based on these results, I can certainly say that leaving emotion out of the voting process is the best way to get ahead. Of course, it probably helped that it was a night of loopy upsets in many categories, large and small.
Also, my family maintained an informal ranking of acceptance speeches. It was their first time hosting the official onebee Oscar Pool tabulation party, and they were excited to contribute. Here's our top five:
George Clooney, Best Supporting Actor
Concise and poignant, not too political and not too serious. Infused with humor and humility. No list of random names.
Gavin Hood, Best Foreign Language Film
Passionate and hopeful, with an endearing recognition of his young actors.
Robert Altman, Honorary Oscar
Humorous and insightful. Altman is always a hoot. Shame about the introduction; Tomlin and Streep would've done much better without a TelePrompTer.
Reese Witherspoon, Best Actress
Cheery and excited, without gushing too much. Very appreciative and uncynical – no matter what you think of her, you had to be happy for her. Would've scored higher if there had been fewer shots of Phillipe.
Three 6 Mafia, Best Original Song
Jon Stewart said it best: this is what an Oscar speech should sound like. These guys were thrilled (and as shocked as we all were) and their excitement exploded all over everywhere.
Also, what was the deal with that Shyamalan AmEx ad? Just fucking weird.
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Sun, March 5
Crash
If you're looking to catch up on Best Picture nominees, may I recommend Sideways, Lost in Translation, or The Sixth Sense? (Read more.)
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Fri, March 3
Oscar Picks!
Now that this year's Movie Tournament (of Movies) has crowned yet another worthy and delightful winner, our thoughts turn to Oscar. More specifically, the onebee Oscar Pool and how to win the damn thing. (Read more.)
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2006 Movie Tournament (of Movies) Champion—9:11 AM
Now that's a mandate! Shopgirl has won this year's Movie Tournament (of Movies), by a hell of a margin. We had quite a few challenging match-ups, and no shortage of surprises, but I think we've picked another great winner this year.
It was a very daunting task indeed to adapt Steve Martin's brilliant, poignant Shopgirl for the big screen, and the result is truly breathtaking. By no means a literal translation of the book, Anand Tucker's intimate and soulful film works as a handy companion piece to Martin's novella. The most difficult thing for Martin the screenwriter was to retain the contemplative tone of the book without resorting to a bunch of hacky voiceover. In this he was mostly successful, but the true success came from director Tucker, who was able to infuse silent moments with longing, regret, and soul-searching.
Credit also is due to Steve Martin's moving and restrained performance, as well as Claire Danes's Mirabelle – a role which drew upon tools from her performance skillset that she hasn't used in a while: a character truly innocent and delicate, but by no means fragile.
Thanks to all who voted – now on to the Oscars! (Where no such brilliance will be recognized.)
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Thu, March 2
(You) Support Our Troops
It's a shame when the decline of civility in our culture can be read on the back of our cars. (Read more.)
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Movie Tournament (of Movies) Finals!—8:11 AM
Wow, I really thought it was going to come down to Wedding Crashers and The 40-Year-Old Virgin – as you can see by my post the other day. It certainly seemed like both had the most momentum, and it made perfect sense to me. Both are very popular and well-made comedies. But, Mr. and Mrs. Smith is a pitch-perfect action adventure, and Shopgirl is nothing short of spectacular, so of course I'm delighted to see them in the final round as well.
Cast your votes – we'll crown a winner tomorrow!
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Wed, March 1
Lost in La Mina
Strategy is quickly taking shape at La Mina beach, and that strategy is: Obey Terry. Terry wants a post-merge voting blitzkrieg. Betray Terry's wishes at your own peril. (Read more.)
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Dodgers vs. Suns—8:54 AM
Yesterday was a lovely day for baseball, so the office ducked out early to attend an exhibition game between the L.A. Dodgers and their AA farm team, the Jacksonville Suns. As you can imagine, I was torn apart! The ultimate showdown between my two "home teams," neither of which I've ever managed to care about one whit. Fortunately, the Suns won 8-3. I'm going to pretend this validates my decision to move from LA to Jacksonville, because so far nothing else has.
(I keed! xoxo Mom!)
Since I last attended a Suns game (sometime in the Truman administration), they've built a fancy new stadium, which looks like a smaller, cheaper Turner Field. It's quite nice, and I bet the Dodgers were jealous because it's ten times more attractive than Dodger Stadium.
Also, the Suns mascot is a big puppy. Presumably because nobody wants to shake hands with a huge plush sun – or maybe the Kellogg's Raisin Bran lawyers came after them. Anyway, as you can imagine, his name is "Southpaw." Also unsurprising is his jersey number: K9. Nevertheless, this brought a tear to my eye, since yesterday was my first McRace away from the poker table and seeing "Belush" waved in front of me between innings seemed to drive the point home.
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