Fri, August 4, 2006
Wear at your own risk—2:46 PM
My dad received this instruction card with a recent underwear purchase:
Read all directions before proceeding with installation.
With front of item facing away from self, locate waistband sides. Bending torso to approximately 45-degree angle, look over and through waistband to floor below. Accurately line up two leg openings with own legs. Once body is sufficiently bent over item and correct corresponding openings have been located, identified and brought into proper alignment, carefully balance on one leg while lifting opposite leg and bringing up and over waistband and matching leg opening. Continue to balance, and insert raised leg through opening until foot makes contact with the floor below. Carefully switch balance to foot that is now through leg opening. Lift opposite leg and repeat motion of raising over item and inserting into opening.
At this point, make sure each leg is in a separate leg opening and each foot has made contact with the floor. Once again, grasp waistband and pull upwards until waist of item rests comfortably on own waist or until pulling motion is impeded by additional body parts.
When used appropriately, item will be covered by additional clothing items and not visible to onlookers. Wash after each wearing. We recommend a wearing not exceeding 24 hours. If consistently longer wearings are desired, we suggest you purchase more than one item.
"Mike" — Fri, 8/4/06 5:04pm
Wait a minute – each leg is to be in a separate leg hole?