Sat, September 30

I just want you people to know—8:23 PM

After a day of fishing and watching a lot of college football, my family is now having a heated discussion over their various methods of solving Sudoku puzzles.

Seriously. They're doing it right now. (Not me; I'm over here.)

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Fri, September 29

60 Seconds

A few additional thoughts in defense of Studio 60 – not that it needs defending. I'm not obsessed or anything! (Read more.)

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Thu, September 28

Show Ponies—9:57 PM

I was thinking today about how we tend to pigeonhole our celebrities. We're accustomed to interacting with them in a specific context, and so we kind of forget that they have any other existence outside that. Perhaps that's why people balk at the idea of Katie Couric hosting the nightly news. "You're a perky little chatbot for doing fluff pieces like 'New Handbags for Fall' and 'The Egg Council presents Clay Aiken' – how dare you interview heads of state?!" Maybe that's why the politically active movie stars suffer such a backlash.

Because it's true, you never really think about Rachael Ray going home and talking about politics with her husband. You don't think about what Letterman's favorite kind of porn is. And we do it with our friends, too. There are certain conversation topics and behaviors that are reserved for certain friends and don't really come out around others.

Just thought that was interesting.

(It's Katie's fault, really. If she were really out to shatter her morning-host reputation, she'd have steered clear of the Suri pictures and the questions about Condi's love life. I guess she's not avariciously bitchy enough.)

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Wed, September 27

Torture by Numbers

Apparently, American Idol isn't the only Fox show where you get to send in your opinion on national matters. (Read more.)

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Mon, September 25

Snark Week

There's not much to love in TV's biggest week of fall premieres – but the lovable show has the added benefit of shimmering with the brilliance of a thousand sunsets. (Read more.)

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Sat, September 23

Exclusive Celebrity Spotting Report!—4:47 PM

At the gym on Thursday, I noticed the girl who plays Ari Gold's daughter in a TV commercial for the new Kibbles 'n Bits breath freshening dog food. I had previously remarked that she was born to play the exceedingly Jewish daughter of an Ari Gold-type Hollywood agent and that we'd never see her in any other acting part. I'm happy to be proved wrong in this case.

Sorry I forgot to update you sooner.

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Fri, September 22

Kicking the Habit—9:14 PM

It's exceedingly rare on onebee for me to:

1. Publish unfinished work.
2. Undertake art projects.

However, last night I was inspired to create something which requires artwork to carry off the idea. I don't draw very well, so I was hesitant to try this project, but as a recovering "brain crack" addict, I realized it was imperative that I go forward anyway.

Is there such a thing as a 1-day chip?

As usual, the results do not live up to my initial vision for the project. As expected, the process of trying and failing yielded many rewards, including a gradual improvement in my skills with the graphic tablet on my computer. The struggle lasted most of today and it's still not half done. However, it's kind of funny in its incomplete state so I thought I'd share it just so today wouldn't feel like too much of a waste.

With any luck, I'll have the finished product to share soon. Until then, here's what I worked on today.

2 comments

You can imagine my (further) disgust—8:57 PM

Only kidding. In fact, I found the incorrectly named "pull-out" feature to be informative and useful, since the finale of season two and the previous EW blurb about season three have me considering a return to Lost fandom.

Not that I ever stopped watching, but for most of season two I was making snarky comments when I should've been taking notes. Thanks to this handy li'l guide (and an in-depth Q&A with Brandon), I'm about as prepared as anyone could reasonably expect to be.

(Also, hats off to EW for not doing this in the form of their infuriating "A to Z" features.)

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Mon, September 18

Sex and the Permafrost

Alaska pays its citizens about $1000 a year to live there. If ABC started the negotiation at $1000, they might be able to sucker a few people into watching Men in Trees. (Read more.)

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Fri, September 15

Hey! It's That Megastar!—9:27 PM

It's early in this year's Annual TiVo Gauntlet of New Fall Programming, but there are signs that the fatigue has set in.

Moments ago, I was watching a rerun of Friends, in which the Joey Tribbiani character keeps screwing up during an audition for a soup commercial. He has some very funny moments stumbling between "Mmm, soup!" and "Mmm, noodle soup!" (Matt LeBlanc is easily the most underrated actor on the show). For a split second I thought, "This is so funny; it reminds me of that other thing he was in where he was that dumb actor on the TV show Deep Powder. What's that movie or TV show I'm thinking of?"

Oh, yeah. Joey.

Admittedly, this doesn't say much for me. But it also doesn't say much for Joey.

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Mon, September 11

Standoffish

You weren't counting on Fox to deliver the new fall shows that were going to capture your imagination and carry you through a blissful season of non-stop entertainment, were you? Good. (Read more.)

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Wed, September 6

It Runs in the Family—2:18 PM

Even Mindy Jennings is inside my brain.

It turns out she's had the same great idea I have: a scrolling LED display for the car, so you can communicate with other motorists. My idea was to put it in the rear windshield, but Mrs. Ken Jennings thinks it'd be more effective in a 360-degree display on the roof.

She also sees far nicer applications for the invention. My planned uses were 20% "Hi, what's your number?" and 75% "THE STREET IS NOT YOUR ASHTRAY, MOTHERFUCKER!" with a few others thrown in, here and there. In her world, it'd be used for ameliorating road rage by flashing, "Sorry, my fault" when she cuts someone off.

To each her own, I guess.

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Tue, September 5

Am I getting "tinfoil hair?"—10:24 PM

The Olbermann Season Pass is already paying dividends – what a cutie! What a charmer! He really is the anti-O'Reilly in every sense. What can I say? I'm hooked. I'll never look at a biscuit or a basket the same way again.

Tonight, as our president endeavors to conflate journalists who question his policies with al Qaeda apologists (or propagandists), Keith is back with another Special Comment. It's a fun one, and a little easier to follow than the last time.

I'm not here to say Keith Olbermann is some sort of god or anything, but it's an enjoyable show and a refreshing level of discourse. Everyone's very pleasant and the points are well thought out. Whether or not you agree with them, you have to respect them.

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Mon, September 4

Razzle Dazzle

I don't care who you are, you have to be happy about Victor Garber returning to television. Fox's Justice may be the price we have to pay. (Read more.)

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Sat, September 2

Adorable Typo Dept.—6:53 PM

Seen on a sign in our town advertising dachshund puppies:

Doxen puppies!

Sounds like someone who should be accompanying Dasher and Vixen, doesn't it? On one side of the sign, it was clear that the 'e' had been added as an afterthought, wedged tightly into what was originally "DOXN." I like DOXN a lot – sleek, fresh, and snappy, it sounds like a Web 2.0 company and looks like a NASDAQ symbol.

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