Wed, April 25, 2007

It's no secret that I don't like President Bush, but I've pretty much quit bitching about it because bitching about it isn't going to do any good. For the most part, I've resigned myself to our widely differing opinions about the best way to conduct world affairs. However, this troop funding bill business throws me for a loop, because his behavior seems completely unreasonable. Usually, even if I strongly disagree with him, I can kind of figure out why he does things; in this case, his actions don't even make sense from his own perspective.

I can figure out why he opposes a timetable for withdrawal of US troops from Iraq, even if I strenuously object to his reasoning. On the one hand, he's right: it does seem senseless to announce a withdrawal date because insurgents, terrorists, what-have-you can just recede into their caves until that date and then return in full force. But that pretends those people have any intent to recede. As it is, they're not being held significantly in check by the presence of our forces. They seem capable of "waiting it out" with or without a specific end date. Remaining in Iraq until terrorists and insurgents simply give up and go away is preposterously unrealistic. What Bush is actually waiting for is everyday Iraqis embracing democracy and demanding their government provide for their security – a process which might be helped along by a deadline.

Also, there's really no way to withdraw without a timetable. You might not announce a specific set of dates, but once people notice you rolling up your tents, they're going to put it together. A surprise overnight exit is impossible – and, by the president's logic, the evildoers would swarm into power right after that, anyway. The only way to prevail over the hypothetical terrorists-in-waiting from the timetable scenario is to stay in Iraq forever. Literally forever, which is untenable from a military personnel standpoint and a budgetary standpoint – not to mention, the American people just won't stand for it. The only thing President Bush can do is delay until January 2009, which accomplishes nothing except allowing him to say, "we didn't lose Iraq on my watch," which is a meaningless and petty political point. Petty political points have their place, but when they cost hundreds of American lives, that's pretty reprehensible.

So, from the military, strategic, fiscal, and political perspectives, it seems that a withdrawal from Iraq is inevitable. We can bicker about the when, but it's sure to happen the next 2-3 years. This is where things become unreasonable, and I'll need to illustrate this with an Amazing Race analogy.

This past week, Danny and Oswald* found themselves in the lead, going into a situation where the Yield was in play. They were also dangerously low on cash – a death sentence this late in the race. They stated that in an effort to "play honorably" (bullshit, but that's a different discussion) they would prefer not to use the Yield. Waiting out the Hours Of Operation Tango with my beloved Dustin and Kandice, they arrived at an agreement whereby the girls would give them some cash and the guys would yield Danielle and Eric. This worked out great for everyone, because the guys were able to do something they needed to do anyway, but make it clear that they were forced into it. (With only four teams left, even the first place team would be wise to use the Yield – any advantage could be pivotal now. I'd have yielded Mirna instead; different discussion.)

With this troop funding bill, President Bush has the same excellent opportunity. He knew this was coming – the Democrats' mid-term victory is tied entirely to the issue of withdrawal from Iraq, since they sustained their remarkable lack of vision on every other issue. He knows the withdrawal itself is inevitable (see above). His own personal pride prevents him from admitting he was wrong (take your pick: WMD, Saddam & 9/11, al Qaeda in Iraq, initial troop levels, "Mission Accomplished", surge effectiveness). So here's the perfect chance to do what he knows must be done without admitting any mistakes. His hands are tied; those idiot Democrats forced him to pull the troops out! Vetoing the bill merely delays much-needed funding for the men and women serving in Iraq to score a political point. Publicly threatening on multiple occasions to veto the bill, even more so. Give the Dems credit for nothing else, but they've finally stopped panicking in response to the wildly vacillating definition of "support" for "the troops." Bush and Cheney should quit whipping that horse carcass and just do what has to be done. There will be no shortage of blame for Congressional Democrats if the move fails – what do they have to lose?

Maybe their endgame is to veto the bill and watch Congress override it – then they have even more people to blame if the withdrawal goes wrong. But something tells me Cheney is unlikely to suddenly take a break from strong-arming Congressional Republicans to bend to his will.

*By the way, Danny and Oswald are the darlings of the unexpectedly brilliant Amazing Race: All-Stars. They've chased and flirted with Phil, they've frolicked with each other and other teams, and they've been dropping the hyper-sibilant homo bons mots like crazy. I can't even think about them without giggling over this: A taxi driver drops them off at a ferry dock and says, "Thees ees ferry area." Oswald adopts his faggiest drawl and repeats, "Oh, this is the fairy area? We're in the fairy area."

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