Wed, July 30

Defending Reality

Some mental patient in "Newsweek" is arguing that air-conditioning is ruining modern society. Yeah and the phone makes it a real bitch to carry on long-distance conversations, too. (Read more.)

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Tue, July 29

Today on TiVo

Some weekends are just perfect for a little TiVo Sampler. This weekend, I got to see a varied panoply of televised misogyny. (Also, Bob Hope doesn't outlive Liza's marriage, but it's a photo finish!) (Read more.)

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Mon, July 28

Slow News Day

There should be something new up by today, but my Sunday flew by faster than expected. That was not, however, entirely a bad thing. (Read more.)

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Fri, July 25

Bea in Oscar's Bonnet

It makes sense that you have to give the Stanley Cup back, because there's only one and each team gets to have it for the year they won. But there are lots of Oscars. They should be given to winners, not loaned out. (Read more.)

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Thu, July 24

'Nnkkyehh–—10:31 PM

"Nnkkyehh– ghschht"

Music to my ears. The sound of Amy Smart weaving "Oookayy" into a bewildered, amused kind of gigglesnort on the set of "The Battle of Shaker Heights," this year's "Project Greenlight" movie. Her character is talking with Shia LaBeouf's character, who is four years her junior but still kinda flirting with her in an offbeat, nerdy way.

"Project Greenlight" is great. It's great to watch if you're interested in the making of filmed entertainment (like me) and enjoy uttering the phrase "Hwah. I coulda done better than that!" (also like me). One of the things they teach you in film school, aside from how to wrangle a drive-on, is that having accomplishments is kind of a liability. Without any, you can scoff at others' work; with 'em, they can just scoff right back. So, the key is to have potential and wield that with all the force you can muster. Your results can't be disappointing if they don't exist, so just stay in potential mode.

Tonight I had four minutes to kill, so I called up last week's P G'light on TiVo and skipped forward to Amy's shining moment. On the way there, I had to pass the whole first day of shooting sequence, which included producers Chris Moore and Jeff Balis second-guessing the directors at every possible turn, quite possibly for the sole purpose of maintaining the directors' uneasiness and asserting their own power.

Wow, Amy Smart is good. Meryl Streep she may not be, but she is excellent at tone, which can be the single defining element that makes-or-breaks a film or TV show. She achieves an unassuming reality that's engaging while still being hilarious in an elegantly subtle way. I like playing back her performance in the art store scene over and over, especially because of that little snarfle at the end.

I only watched that 40 seconds of tape. (Tape? Ha! It's TiVo time, baby! Where we're going, we don't need roads!) Watched it about three times and that's enough; I only needed to kill a couple minutes anyway. Isn't TiVo great? Anything, on demand, you're in you're out. But as I was saving it for later minute-killing use, I was reminded of the "scenes." (As in, "scenes from next week's 'Project Greenlight.'") I usually don't watch the scenes. Certainly not on "The West Wing" or "Ed." But on P G'light, there's no harm. It's all silly anyway. In the scenes, the directors are trying to come up with a solution to their communication problems with the rest of the crew. Kyle Rankin suggests notecards (out of context, who can say towards what end) and Chris Moore's response is along the lines of "Notecards?? Notecards?? I'm not doing notecards! I've made thirteen films!"

I just really hope Rankin's reply is "Yeah, but you're counting 'Stolen Summer' in there aren't you? Despite the fact that everyone agrees that was a big steaming pile of squirrel turd?" Oh, how I hope...

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Wed, July 23

Television Without Pity: Trading Spaces

Television Without Pity is a great site for the thoughtful, snarky appreciation of TV. But the key is appreciation. Otherwise, it's just a bunch of foul, gruff diatribes about how terrible everything is. (Read more.)

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Tue, July 22

Because I occasionally—12:50 PM

Because I occasionally need a break from self-examination, I have been turning to the web to examine others. Good bloggers are fun to read because they talk about things that interest me, they speak eloquently and have neat ideas, and they are usually pretty damn funny.

This week, through a series of links (I always end up following a series of links even though I'm distinctly not that kind of web surfer), I ended up at Tomato Nation. I'm not sure whether it's a blog or what, in terms of its writing, but it features The Vine, which is an advice column. I can't believe this is the first time I've seen such a thing on one of these sites! What a brilliant idea! I'm instantly jealous.

Sars (rhymes with "ploughshares") has a quick wit and a wealth of common sense and every one of her responses makes you think "Yeah! That's the perfect answer!" True, most of them can be stripped down to "Be an adult" or in rare cases "Expect others to behave like adults." But she almost always backs that up with something sagacious and enlightening.

I'm so jealous. I have all kinds of opinions about other people's problems, honed over years of Loveline and Trading Spaces. And Dawson's Creek. Plus, Sars requires all letters to be signed with an alias, but she doesn't make enough out of them. Her response may excerpt the pseudonym but she doesn't play with it like I would.

For example, if a letter is signed "Love to Shop," Sars may begin her reply "Dear Love" or maybe "Dear Shopper." Me, I'd want to say "Dear Veto." "Seeking Normalcy Assurance" would be "King Normal." Assuredly, not all entries lend themselves to such devious segmentation, but it would be my goal to make sure that there was some sort of fun wordplay with each. Maybe this is a silly reason to want an advice column of my own, but it's one of many reasons and I think they're all damn good!

So, for the first time ever, I'm disappointed that my site's readership is around eight people all of whom I know and already give advice to when asked. I can't decide whether to just appropriate some of Sars's letters and give my own responses, or try "reviewing" her responses, or just write some fictitious letters of my own to get the ball rolling. Most importantly, I have to find a way to increase my readership, and increase it fast!

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Sun, July 20

The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen

To borrow a friend's ingeniously coined phrase, the adaptors of The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen have parlayed a full house into a pair of twos. (Read more.)

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Fri, July 18

This Stupid Country...

My sense of moral outrage has been ignited by so many things at once that I've had to start combining some of them. How long has it been since we had a good old-fashioned rant? (Ari, I'm looking in your direction...) (Read more.)

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Thu, July 17

Hurricane Claudette

Like the eyewitness who sobbed that today's catastrophe in Santa Monica should spawn a new commitment to farmer's market safety industry-wide, the TV networks love to squeeze the maximum drama out of a hurricane. (Read more.)

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Mon, July 14

Project Greenlight: Pre-Production

The plan was to review only individual episodes, or wait until a series had run its course to review the whole thing. But some series are too indivisible to review piecemeal and way too infuriating to wait for the end. (Read more.)

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Sat, July 12

Car Chases

Ha ha! I like my pretty new stars and all the fancy designs they can make. So I'm going to be rating some things from time to time. Today: movie car chases. Strap in and feel the G's! (Read more.)

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Fri, July 11

Desperation and Lunacy in TV News

I know, I know. I say it all the time. But dammit, broadcast news is really in the toilet! I mean, the highlight of my TV news day was a car chase, for crying out loud! (Read more.)

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Thu, July 10

Acceptance Speech

Because of this speech, we had to see Tom Selleck kiss Kevin Kline. (It was worth it.) I found it in a drawer this week and it seems to resonate with recent events. For now, it will stand in for my forthcoming remarks. (Read more.)

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Wed, July 9

Glengarry Glen Ross

I really like David Mamet and I've always heard great things about Glengarry Glen Ross but I wanted to wait for DVD. Always wait for DVD, kids! (Read more.)

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Tue, July 8

On the Record with Bob Costas

You would think that a Bob Costas interview show would always be about sports, but it's not. Just further evidence of what a Renaissance Man Bob Costas is. (Read more.)

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Mon, July 7

28 Days Later

Ha ha! Have you heard the one about how 28 Days Later sounds like a sequel to the Sandra Bullock bomb 28 Days? Oh those quick-witted entertainment writers! (Read more.)

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Sun, July 6

SpaceBag

In the 21st century, no problem that society faces cannot be solved by innovation. The advertising industry can't help it if most of these innovations are so undesirable that they must resort to the hard sell. (Read more.)

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Fri, July 4

The Hulk

(Read more.)

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Thu, July 3

David Letterman: Hillary Clinton

Hillary Clinton returned to visit Letterman again recently, and another fine program was the result. Letterman continues to deliver a uniquely appealing late-night show amidst a sea of lame imitators. (Read more.)

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Wed, July 2

S.W.A.T.

At first, I regarded S.W.A.T. as one of those movies like True Crime – where the studio seems to be saying "We're releasing it, whether you care or not." But the billboards have begun to change all that. (Read more.)

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Tue, July 1

Garbled Reception

A wedding can be constructed to toast your union to someone very special with some of your closest friends, or it can be photo album fodder with a bunch of your parents' pals. (Read more.)

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